The Watermelon Miracle

Posted on by

To tickle your funny bone this holiday weekend:

Sketch from That Mitchell and Webb Look.

Related posts:

  1. It’s a Miracle!

  • fubar

    humor, food theme, linked via rraaiinnnnwwiillssoomnss ttwwiitttteerr:

    http://www.theonion.com/content/video/new_weara…

  • Barb Ruth-Wright

    Priceless. And true, so true. Thank you for this much needed comic relief.

    Barb

  • Barb Ruth-Wright

    I'd love to see a bit of humor on the unspeakable evil of taking sides in cases of physical abuse – any creative souls? I can see a bully on the playground, kicking a little kid in the shins…a young Baha'i approaches…no, no, wait – he doesn't approach – he flees…

    Barb

  • Bird

    Thanks for the lift! Happy 4th to those who still celebrate it. Bird

  • Craig Parke

    As a military veteran I don't still celebrate the 4th anymore. My father pretty much still didn't either after World War II at some level in his soul although he went through the motions. My Great Uncle came out of World War I with half his brains gone and lived at the mental level of a very small child for another 35 years in VA hospitals until he died so that side of the family was not really big into it either. A young woman one nephew once seriously dated who our family liked very much had both parents die from some agent of Gulf War Syndrome that caused a rare brain cancer in both parents. Her father was there. Her mother breathed the dust that came out of a box of military things he shipped home.

    As the Baha'is would say, I guess it is just the breaks in the luck of the draw in “doing God's work”.

    “Let hapless dupes suffer and die … so everyone will be Baha'i!”

    My family got some of the bad cards.

    In regard to Barb's playground bully question and the typical Baha'i Administrative Order “guidance” on such situations, Jesus's Parable of the Good Samaritan comes to mind. I thought we settled this 2,000 years ago on what the correct spiritual moral choice is? Isn't it supposed to be to help the person who needs help and not “pass by on the other side” for archetypal Chief Priest, Scribe, and Pharisee “religious system” reasons? Especially when you asked the other to help you when you needed help first? Clergy always top down tell people to “pass by on the other side” so everyone can be controlled by the “us” vs “them” divisive thought “religious system”.

    I no longer buy any of it.

    Nope. I don't celebrate the 4th any more. But Happy 4th to those of you who still do!

    So it goes.

  • fubar

    IndependenceDay

    The original patriotism of the radical whigs and others that protested against, and eventually split from, the corrupt system of british nobility, imperialism, mercantilism and religious conformism is indeed still worthy of celebration. It represented one of the most remakable conjunctions of a fundamental paradigm shift in humanity's social operating system alongside a structural revolution in economics, politics and governance. The heroism of those patriots, standing up for their beliefs against severe oppression, in the face of overwhelming military and economic superiority, is still stunning. And to think that it was mostly about farmers disgruntled over bad tobacco loans from english banks, others mad about high rum taxes, and the king of england's unwillingness to fund enourmous military campaigns to slughter indians so the frontier could be made more open to settlers!

    As always, the sublime rises out of the mundane.

    The events surrounding the original 4th of July were later misappropriated, etc., resulting, ironically of course, in many career opportunities for anti-establishment comedians from the 1960s onward.

    As such, I propose that George Carlin be elevated to civic sainthood, and that statues of him be placed in all shopping malls across america. the statues will contain audio-video players, which will blast shoppers with Carlins' routine about “stuff” (conspicuous consumption). Psychedelic 3D holographic projections will be implemented to convey the blessings of Carlinism in as realistic a manner as befits this great epoch of citizen participation and half-off sales.

    As we celebrate the dawning of yet another great epoch in the unfoldment of democracy, let is not forget the ideas of a chicken in every pot, and a soar powered composting toilet in every house.

  • fubar

    Excellent. Yes. I'll smoke to that.

    The bahai could not intervene because the bully might be a conservative, and intervening could thus be considered a partisan activity be people that study the perception of perspectives within memetic paradigm shifts.

    One solution to this trying dilemma could be for all bahais to have their brains crygenically frozen for 1,000 years (no one would notice much difference?) until world peace is established by someone else, then they could emerge from cryo-obscurity to embrace the ungodless watermelons of the world genetically engineered by the hypothetic future world superstate's vast apparatus of harmonized science-religion under a great geodesic-dome covered organic, sustainable rainforest.

  • Craig Parke

    I like this plan. Instead of “Vanilla Sky” we can call it “Peppermint Sky”. I think this is what is going to happen anyway. The meetings will go on forever with endless words. People will take the full Ruhi Courses over and over with the same group of people generation after generation filling in the blanks over and over until death takes them. Just pass the books on to their kids who will then take the same courses over and over in “preparation” for something that will never happen.

    Everyone else will build the Kingdom of God from real innate talent even though they have never heard of the Baha'i Faith. They will do it from direct spiritual contact in their own hearts and minds with the actual Spirit of the World Age that comes to everyone from the Cosmos. Why use a coat hanger for rabbit ears when you can just get digital cable? The ideas of the world discussed in “the fierce urgency of NOW” are the equivalent of digital cable. Baha'u'llah and Abdu'l-Baha taught this kind of connection. But Shoghu Effendi is the Supreme Manifestation of God now in the current version of the Baha'i Faith. The AO idolatry is incredibly materialistic and mechanistic in approach. Dumbed down mechanical spiritual communists in Brooks Brothers suits. The same old, same old.

    So the Baha'is will be frozen in 1957 forever doing their “courses” in “preparation” while everyone else will get the Divine Message from their Nike shoes and “Just Do It”. They will build the Kingdom of God from pure reason and actual joy in life and just buy our real estate 800 years from now.

    I have a movie script idea of a Divine Teacher in 800 years who is a world class rock guitarist. The only workbook would be the classic text “Be Dangerous on Blues Guitar”.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWLw7nozO_U

    The Baha'is will just be frozen with Ted Williams and Walt Disney waiting to emerge from cryo-obscurity.

    So it goes.

    BTW, I absolutely hated “Vanilla Sky” and felt bad for Tom Cruise. It was painful to watch…until the last 20 minutes where they ALMOST saved that film. But it was too late.

  • Craig Parke

    Have you all seen this yet?

    I tell you “non-involvement in politics” won't hold water anymore as the World Age unfolds now that anyone with a decent used computer system and a $100 time based video editing system can get to work on things in their basement. To be able to do that used to cost $250,000 just for starters. Not any more. And you can publish it worldwide instantly with the click of a mouse onto one of the thought band valence electron shells of the broadband planetary atom. You can't enforce “non-involvement in POLITICs” now unless you extrapolate it to mean “non- involvement in COMEDY”.

    Ridiculing people as idiots and morons for having narcissistic personality disorder in any position in any organization on Earth is the FIRST DUTY of Earth citizenship now.

    ANY person. ANY organization. ANY kind of organization. ANYWHERE. is fodder for pure comedy farce.

    The Promised Day Has Come.

    I can't wait to get up in six hours at the beautiful Sunrise and go to work for another day writing computer programs on this currently dysfunctional planet that can empower human creativity for a quantum change! YAY!

    Hitler Finds Out Sarah Palin Resigns

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IzNPEGWNos&eurl…

  • Craig Parke

    Have you all seen this yet?

    I tell you “non-involvement in politics” won't hold water anymore as the World Age unfolds now that anyone with a decent used computer system and a $100 time based video editing system can get to work on things in their basement. To be able to do that used to cost $250,000 just for starters. Not any more. And you can publish it worldwide instantly with the click of a mouse onto one of the thought band valence electron shells of the broadband planetary atom. You can't enforce “non-involvement in POLITICs” now unless you extrapolate it to mean “non- involvement in COMEDY”.

    Ridiculing people as idiots and morons for having narcissistic personality disorder in any position in any organization on Earth is the FIRST DUTY of Earth citizenship now.

    ANY person. ANY organization. ANY kind of organization. ANYWHERE. is fodder for pure comedy farce.

    The Promised Day Has Come.

    I can't wait to get up in six hours at the beautiful Sunrise and go to work for another day writing computer programs on this currently dysfunctional planet that can empower human creativity for a quantum change! YAY!

    Hitler Finds Out Sarah Palin Resigns

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IzNPEGWNos&eurl…